Welcome, future peasant.
Welcome to the website of Prickfuck Industries (a wholly owned subsidiary of Wheel Group s.r.o). You have arrived at our website in search of a website, and you have found it. Your search is over. We are here for one reason: To obliterate all other corporations on Earth.
You may be wondering how this is possible, but we do not wonder this. We are assured by our leading range of diversified market strategies, research, and amazing products. There has never been a conglomerate in history like Prickfuck, and there never will be again.
Our website, and company, are based in The United States of Awesome. If you want to do business with us, you had better know about the proper name of this great country. To ensure you don't forget your duty as a citizen, we have made our website patriotic to remind you that not only is this website in the greatest country in the entire history of countries, but also that we at Prickfuck do not tolerate second bests. It is anathema to our goal.
In today's internet, of serious business, there exists a sincere need for that which is upstat, on target, packaged, downloadable, interchangeable, and reconfigurable. Memetic transmissions enable a new level of semantic communication, and Prickfuck meets this need, as well as over ISO 9000.
Latest News
Prickfuck Industries. Is Here. For You.7 May 08
An active conglomerate strides the earth like a juggernaut, entire countries shaking from its steps.
Standards
Prickfuck has no standards beyond crushing the opposition. Whatever methods achieve this goal, we claim as Standard Technology. Do not be fooled by mealy-mouthed moralists who will sincerely object to these methods: they are asking for a boot to the neck.
Second income stream
Recruit people for our exclusive mission and e-consultancy solutions, and earn DOLLAHS. They're like dollars, but we embellish with them extra awesomeness, and you can use them just like real dollars — they're just accepted in a subset of retail locations.
“ Thanks to DOLLAHS, I bought this speedboat.&rdquo — G. Meatfist, Offshore Banking, Inc.
Availability
Prickfuck is everywhere and nowhere, always available and never available.
Ubiquity is our buzzword.
As Prickfuck CEO, Gerry X. Meatfist said in The Way To Ubiquity:
“Go there, and do some things, and make sure you do them WITH THE ABSOLUTE MOST AWESOMENESS YOU CAN POSSIBLY CONTAIN AT ALL TIMES. Also, snake.”Education
Education merely confuses the masses, and does not prepare them for the onslaught of vicious corporate hegemony. Therefore, we at Prickfuck hereby inform you that you have been chosen to sit on your hire-purchase furniture, stuffing Doritos into your fundament as you provide the ideal captive sphere for the next episode of How I Met Your Mother. You should complete this work as soon as possible. Also, please do not engage in very strenuous activity, for your protection.